Funny Quotes
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
- Mark Twain
I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.
- George Carlin
We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.
- Robin Williams
A difference of tastes in jokes is a great strain on [...]
August 5th, 2008 at 7:59 am
lol! this is rlly funny!!! cool quotes guys!
– i didn’t say it was ur fault, i said that i was gonna blame u!–
July 25th, 2008 at 6:44 pm
Who really took the bite out of the Apple logo?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have a “S” in it?
July 11th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
your mama so fat that when she went to school she sat next to everybody.
July 10th, 2008 at 9:01 pm
help ive fallen and i cant . . . . .oh nice carpet !
July 3rd, 2008 at 1:26 pm
written by a primary school child in year 4
“i have everything someone would want”
told to me by my friend Jenna Alansari
“nobody knows the pain an arab teenage girl goes through, i mean we are born with a pelt!”
“im not a chav! im football casual!!” “what rather than football formal?”
June 20th, 2008 at 11:05 am
A man with his hand in his pants feels cocky!
June 17th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
doesnt expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected?
June 13th, 2008 at 8:50 am
I took a spork, and broke off the middle prong…
LOOK! MY SPORK THINKS IT”S BATMAN!
June 11th, 2008 at 4:04 am
this thing is more cooler than getting a frozen yougert ………………………………………………………………………….. nooooooooooooooooooot
June 8th, 2008 at 10:32 pm
Marriage is a relationship in which one is always right, and the other is the husband. =)
-im only 13 but i love that quote
June 7th, 2008 at 5:46 pm
read a book dont have s*x
June 3rd, 2008 at 5:56 pm
Why do they call it PMS? Because mad cow disease was already taken.
May 29th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
-When life gives you lemons, squirt them in your enemy’s eyes.
-A wise woman once said: “Men are like a deck of cards. You need:
A heart to love them.
A diamond to marry them.
A club to bash their f***ing head in.
A spade to bury them.
-Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you’ll be a mile away with their shoes.
- If you look like your passport picture you need a vacation.
-Don’t get mad, get even.
-When the blind leadeth the blind, get out of the way!
-Keep smiling: It makes everyone wonder what you’re up to.
-Love your enemies…it pisses them off.
-When one door closes, another one opens waiting to be slammed in your face. (by me)
May 28th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
im not as dumb aas you look
are you a parking ticket coz youve got fine writen all over you
its only funny whn i laugh
your mums so dumb she tripped over a cordless fone (haha that ones for kathy)
you can take off the mask now halloweens over. oh wait thats your face !
do you have a face under that make-up?
May 28th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
im impressed! ive neva met annione with such a small brain in such a big head
this goes out to all the dumb ppl on this website
May 25th, 2008 at 7:05 am
A Woman Only Needs Four Animals In Her Life.
A Mink In Her Closet.
A Jaguar In Her Garage
A Tiger In Her Bed
And A Jackass Who Pays The Bills.
-Paris Hilton-
May 17th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
I thought my attitude was bad …………….That was until I smelt your breath!
—————————–
Have you noticed how all out problems star with MEN:
MENstraul cycle
MENopause
MENtal anxiety
MENstraul cramps and
MENtal breakdown
May 17th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit……Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.
Whoever said that nothing is impossible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
May 17th, 2008 at 3:40 am
Lifes a bitch, so act the pimp and slap her around a little
May 16th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
There was this kid in class. The Teacher told the kid to recite the alphabet.
” ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOQRSTUVWYZ
The teacher said where is the p?
the little boy said ” down my pants”