SAYINGS and QUOTES

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.
- Oscar Wilde

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde

It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead.
- Rose Macaulay

May your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders.
- Anonymous

Too slow to keep worms in a tin.
- Anonymous

I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.
- Oscar Wilde

The way to procure insults is to submit to them: a man meets with no more respect than he exacts.
- William Hazlitt

A slander is like a hornet; if you can’t kill it dead the first time, better not strike at it.
- H.W. Shaw

I am a poor man, but I would gladly give ten shillings to find out who sent me the insulting Christmas card I received this morning.
– George Grossmith

Debating against him is no fun, say something insulting and he looks at you like a whipped dog.
– Harold Wilson

Never insult anyone by accident.
- Robert A. Heinlein

May your arse cheeks turn into bicycle wheels and backpedal up your arse!
- Anonymous

She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.
- Oscar Levant

Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone.
- Arab Proverb

Humans only use about 1/10 of their brain power. With you, it could be less.
- Anonymous

I can’t believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.
- Steven Pearl

I’ve had a wonderful evening - but this wasn’t it.
- Groucho Marx

It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead.
- Rose Macaulay

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<p>A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.<br /> - Oscar Wilde</p> <p>Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.<br /> - Oscar Wilde</p> <p>It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead.<br /> - Rose Macaulay</p> <p>May your ears turn into arseholes and shit on your shoulders.<br /> - Anonymous</p> <p>Too slow to keep worms in a tin.<br /> - Anonymous</p> <p>I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes.<br /> - Oscar Wilde</p> <p>The way to procure insults is to submit to them: a man meets with no more respect than he exacts.<br /> - William Hazlitt</p> <p>A slander is like a hornet; if you can’t kill it dead the first time, better not strike at it.<br /> - H.W. Shaw</p> <p>I am a poor man, but I would gladly give ten shillings to find out who sent me the insulting Christmas card I received this morning.<br /> – George Grossmith</p> <p>Debating against him is no fun, say something insulting and he looks at you like a whipped dog.<br /> – Harold Wilson</p> <p>Never insult anyone by accident.<br /> - Robert A. Heinlein</p> <p>May your arse cheeks turn into bicycle wheels and backpedal up your arse!<br /> - Anonymous</p> <p>She has the answer to everything and the solution to nothing.<br /> - Oscar Levant</p> <p>Insults should be written in sand, compliments should be carved in stone.<br /> - Arab Proverb</p> <p>Humans only use about 1/10 of their brain power. With you, it could be less.<br /> - Anonymous</p> <p>I can’t believe that out of 10,000 sperm, you were the quickest.<br /> - Steven Pearl</p> <p>I’ve had a wonderful evening - but this wasn’t it.<br /> - Groucho Marx</p> <p>It was a book to kill time for those who like it better dead.<br /> - Rose Macaulay</p> from <a href="http://sayings.funnyjunkz.com/insulting-quotes-and-sayings/">Insulting Quotes and Sayings</a>